Funny but true quotes"Hell! there ain't no rules around here! We are tryin' to
accomplish somepn'n!" "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
"Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what
separates us from the animals. Except the weasel." "A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend
on the support of Paul." "Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have
their shoes." "An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows." "If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple
of car payments." "Never miss a good chance to shut up." "Good judgment comes from bad experiences, and a lot of that comes
from bad judgment." "The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat." "Never test the depth of the water with both feet." "It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others." "If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember what the lie was." "Some days you are the bug, some days you are the windshield." "Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it." "Experience is the sinking feeling you have made this mistake before." "Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance." "Have you ever lent someone $20 and never seen that person again? It was probably worth it." "The darkest hours come just before the dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbour's milk and newspaper, that's the time to do it." "Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day." "Borrow money from a pessimist, they don't expect it back." "I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure." "It was all so different before everything changed." "Nostalgia isn't what is used to be." |
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