July, 1999 The Hoser Weather: Drink beer and eat back bacon to celebrate Canada Day. We celebrate it every day.
Vol. 2, No. 10

What To Do With Snowshoes And Stuff In The Summer

by Bob McKenzie, Editor 

-- I edited too, eh! -- Doug McKenzie, the other Editor 

BobOkay, good day, welcome to the Hoser.
DougHow's it goin', eh?
BobSince this is a long topic, we don't have a lot of space, eh? Go, hoser.
DougBe quiet, eh? I got a lot of talking to do!
BobI was, I said go, eh?
DougShut up, eh? Like, you're blowin' the whole issue!
BobOk, I'll be quiet, then.
DougSHH! Take off!
BobYou take off!
DougStop talking!
DougYou didn't stop!
BobOh, look what you did. We're almost out of space.
DougOk, sorry folks. Start over.
BobWe don't have enough space left. Just say part of the topic.
DougOk. Today the topic is what to do with, like, your snowshoes and stuff in the summer. Go, hosehead!
DougNow you're blowin' the issue. List the things we use in the winter, and I'll tell you what to do in the summer.
BobOk, then. How 'bout snowshoes?
DougYeah, we use them as tennis rackets.
BobBut we hardly ever play tennis, hoser.
DougThat's cause we use our tennis rackets as snowshoes. Next one, eh?
BobOk, boots.
DougPut your boots on when you're walking through mud, or you'll sink.
BobWhat if there's no mud?
DougUh, put your snow chains on them for better traction on the dry ground. Next one, hoser.
BobWhat about tuques and gloves?
DougI'm wearing my tuque, eh?
BobI use my snowmobile gloves when I'm makin' back bacon, so I don't burn my hands. That reminds me, what about snowmobiles? This is a quiz for Doug.
BobI knew it! You're stuck, eh?
DougTake off, you're slowin' down the issue!
BobYou were the one who wrecked it in the first place.
DougWell, now I know what I'm doing with our snowmobile, eh?
BobWhat's that, you nobk?
DougI'm gonna use it to steamroller you!
BobTake off! That's The Hoser for this month, good day.
DougGood day, eh?

SCTV Reruns

Howzit goin'? They'll be showing SCTV in Canada on The Comedy Network at least until November, eh, and sometimes on NBC in the USA, too. Go to the SCTV page for more information, eh?

Strange Brew 2

Ok, we've got more info on our movie, eh? We start our own brewing company, so we're calling it Home Brew, eh? And, we're gonna start filming this month in Toronto, eh? So, here's the Canoe article, and there's always info on alt.tv.sctv, eh?