|February, 1998||Weather: If Doug gets up and sees his shadow, it means 6 more beers 'till we have to go to the Beer Store.|
|Vol. 1, No. 5|
by Doug McKenzie, Editor
-- I edited too, eh! -- Bob McKenzie, the other Editor
|Doug||Ok, it's me, Doug, and so it's like February, eh? And like, people say February sucks, since it's the shortest month. I think it's ok, though, 'cause it has Groundhog Day. And like, when my hosehead brother Bob wakes up on Groundhog Day, and sees his shadow, it means he's hung over, and won't be able to get up for 6 weeks.|
|Bob||No, you hoser! I wasn't the one hung over this morning, you were, eh? So, you shouldn't be writing this paper, you can't even be a paperboy.|
|Doug||Did I ever tell the story of when we were paperboys, back when we were like, 10 years old?|
|Bob||Oh, take off! We were not paperboys!|
|Doug||Ok, it doesn't matter. Another good thing about February, is Valentine's day. This is the day that you give your true love a box of chocolates. So like, this beer here is my true love, but like, it can't eat chocolates, eh? So it gives them to me. That's why this beer is my true love.|
|Bob||Let me apologize to my brother, Doug, for saying he was hung over. He's not, eh?|
|Doug||Oh, geez... You're being nice all of the sudden. You want some chocolate beer, too, hosehead?|
|Bob||He's not hung over, he's still drunk!|
|Doug||Oh, take off!|
|CANADIAN CONTENT CERTIFICATION|
THIS ONLINE NEWSPAPER IS CERTIFIED 100% CANADIAN CONTENT BY THE CANADIAN CULTURAL IDENTITY COMMISSION.
My main page, with news related to a bunch of Canadian comedies, including SCTV and The Red Green Show. There's also sound clips from both of those, plus an online newspaper, The Hoser, "written" by Bob and Doug McKenzie.
Send me your questions or comments about anything on the site to firstname.lastname@example.org. I'll try to reply within a few days of receiving the message, but make sure you tell me what page you're talking about.
Copyright ©1997, 1998 Chris "Bob" Odorjan