Only socks [LE01]

I love to go a-wandering
Among the shoreline rocks
And as I go I yell a lot
Because I'm wearing only socks

Valderow, valderouch
Because I'm wearing only socks

I like to have a bath each day
With a book and scotch on the rocks
I never know if my feet get clean
Because I'm always wearing socks

I love to skulk around at night
And jimmy Chevy locks
The police are rather mystified
"It was some guy wearing socks!"

Some people say it's difficult
To sneak up on a fox
It's really not that hard, you know
If you're wearing only socks

The way I lived my mother said
I'd end up with the pox
But I've kept my virtue pure and clean
Wearing Goodyear socks.

[Feel free to change "socks" to "Argyll socks" and adjust the wording as required.]


Socks for Jesus

Mary looked up at Jesus
At the fading of the light.
"I've knitted you some socks," she said,
"It's bound to be cold tonight"

Later Judas wandered by
Said, "You know money talks.
I thought they took all your clothes
But I guess they left your socks."

Pontius came to check Him out
He's the kind of dude who mocks
But, amazed, he just scratched his head,
"Now where'd you get those socks?"

In the dusk came skulking by
The ones they'd called his flocks
But all of them were rather stunned
At the Miracle of the Socks

And now at Easter we celebrate
The Miracle of Socks
With gifts and cards, for as Judas noted
In this world, money talks.

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